Little in our own eyes...
"Samuel said, 'Though you are little in your own eyes, are you not head of the tribes of Israel? The LORD anointed you king over Israel. And the LORD sent you on a mission... why then did you not obey the voice of the LORD?'"
(1 Sam. 15:17-19)
Insecurity. Self-doubt. We all have it at times. Those "tapes that we play in our heads"... telling us that we're not good enough... not qualified enough... not attractive enough... not in-shape enough... not smart enough... not faithful enough... not (fill in whatever it is that you struggle with) enough...
Saul was the first king of Israel (well, first human king... God was their original king!). As the nation was just getting started, God hand-picked Saul to lead the people. Saul was young, handsome, tall, and a little unsure of himself. So God walked him through what was to happen - step by step. All he had to do was follow God's lead!
In 1 Samuel 15, God sends Saul on a mission. To get events on the Amalekites for their lack of hospitality years before when Israel was homeless in the wilderness. Gods' instructions (which cause us to cringe today) were to leave no survivors and take no booty. Destroy everything. God was VERY clear about this. Saul was, indeed, victorious on the battlefield... but he didn't follow the commands to the letter. He kept their king prisoner... and the soldiers kept TONS of spoil - from animals to gold to other valuables.
When Samuel (the prophet of God) called Saul out for this... first he denied it... then he claimed that they did it FOR THE LORD! To offer God the best animals and other items for sacrifice. Samuel wasn't buying it. H knew that Saul probably wanted the approval of the people - that soldiers with spoil have arm feelings about their commander-in-chief. But Samuel's chastisement was so clear: "Though you are little in your own eyes, are you not the head of the tribes of Israel?!?" Even though you're worried, insecure, and wanting to play to your "support base," GOD HAS GIVEN YOU THIS POSITION, SAUL! Be the leader God needs you to be! Don't look to others for your sense of self-worth. God has given you this role for a reason!
Wow. So many of us need to hear this. We all have been given gifts, roles, jobs, and tasks. Trust that God knows what he's doing! Follow God's guidance - work for justice, defend the defenseless, live lives of love, seek the LORD in all things, and be humble. That's what God requires of ALL of us... even if we're not the king.